TRB's Advice from the Uber

  We all have those times when unwarranted advice is thrown our way. Stock tips from your douchebag uncle, parenting pointers from total strangers, or a Facebook comment on how to beat your traffic ticket. It's always going to happen no matter how hard you try to avoid it. It's just in people's nature these days to get all up in another person's business in an attempt to make themselves look like some kind of prophet. Yes it can be annoying as hell, so bear with me as I (kinda) do the same thing.

  So I've done this whole Uber thing for almost a year now. It's a great side gig for two reasons. I get a little extra change in my pocket, and I get to meet a LOT of new people. Meeting new people isn't much different once you've worked in retail as long as I have, but your audience is markedly different in the comfort of your own car. I've taken grandmothers to physical therapy appointments, couples home from an anniversary dinner, and third shift stockers to work. Hell, I've even driven a guy three blocks to meet his weed man because he was "too fucked up to walk there". But the one group I see the most is the millennial college student. Both drunk and sober, this is by far the biggest percentage of my temporary back seat buddies.

  On several occasions, I have overheard (not intentionally, but it's a sedan so there's not much privacy) the whole "what am I doing with my life" conversation. And I completely understand where they're coming from. In my twenties I had absolutely no clue what I was doing with my life. Did I want to get married? What job was I going to take to make it to retirement? Where would I live? Those questions and a ton more swirled about in my hungover brain daily. But then I got older, not necessarily wiser, and experienced about a million different things in life that helped me arrive at one simple conclusion. Find my happiness and never let it go.

  Now in order to achieve this elusive state, I had to do one thing first. I had to establish who I was. Not defined by a job, a car, or any other material status symbol. I had to be able to wake up every morning and know that the dude looking back in the mirror while I took my morning piss was me, and not a byproduct of anyone or anything else. It took a long time and a lot of shit, both good and bad, to come to that conclusion. But once I knew who I was, and what made me who I am, I was able to embrace that as the center of my existence. MY identity. How I HONESTLY perceive myself.. The establishment that came into existence in 1979. A total and complete understanding of who I am and what makes me tick. With that in hand, I could now pursue my happiness.

  With that understanding in hand, I was finally able to find my happiness. It came in several different forms for me, including an amazing wife, and two little Rantys that I would kill for to keep them safe. The bullshit at work, ups and downs with friends, and family crises can always be counteracted by the sunshine that they bring to my core every day. Throw in a dog that we all love, and I feel that nothing can truly go wrong with them in my corner. That feeling cannot be lost on me ever, which brings me back to the driver's seat of my car.


 When a passenger asks my advice on a topic (which oddly enough happens at least once a night),  I simply offer them the easiest questions to ask, which are almost immediately followed by the hardest answers. I don't pry or poke for backstory, because we're only going to be together for a few minutes. I usually will ask if they're happy with who they have established themselves to be, and if the person/thing/place causing their strife makes them truly happy. Or do they even know yet what makes them happy? (That one gets a "Damn, that shit is DEEP" almost every time). Now I will admit there have been a few times I may have come off like the douchebag uncle, but I've yet to be told to "Butt out" or "Shut the fuck up, you're an Uber driver, what could you possibly know, I'm Drunk Susan and you can't tell me shit, blah, blah, blah." Again, I'm not a philosophizer, nor am I a hack like that fat fuck Dr. Phil, I'm just a guy who gets asked questions in a car driving (mostly) drunk people home. And if my UNprofessional opinion can make someone's day better, I'm all in. So here's my semi-unsolicited advice to you, which is only "semi-unsolicited" because you've read this far without closing the browser yet -

  Keep it simple. Know who you are and stand by it. And find that which makes you truly happy.

Until next time amigos -

Ranty